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A short story today. We decided to go back out to the bowling green at Chalambar Golf Club in Ararat because at least they gave us some information when we were there. The club has one tiffdwarf green. They used to have a second but like many golf clubs, they thought it would make a better putting green. We couldn't find mats and jacks so Mal asked Steve, former bowler and defending C-Grade golf champion. Steve and Mal walked over to the shed and Steve found the key. The got a mat and jacks. Steve amd his wife gave us a little cheer squad. We rolled up. Mal worked it out straight away. Jean struggled with grass - got weight fine. The only time she got shot was when she aimed her bowl straight at the jack. It was weird because there was no wind. Chalambar Golf Club - nice to meet golfers for a change.

We had bad luck today. We've been trying to ring Ararat Bowling Club for days but they never answer. We've left messages but nobody contacted us. We decided we'd drive out and find out when the four Ararat clubs play social. Jean woke up at three AM and trawled the internet. She found a notice that said Ararat had triples on at 12:30 so we drove out and arrived at 10:15. There were some blokes having a meeting. Jean asked about the game. They looked at her quizzically and said "It's already done". It was Lara all over again. No offer to accommodate us. They just went back to their business. We won't go back there. Then we went to VRI. It was all closed up with No Tresspassers signs and no info about social bowls. Then we went to Chalambar Golf Club. At least there a bar staff member told us they play on Thursday - after we leave. We finished up at Aradale. Waze took us to the street behind the club. From the back we saw a bloke leaving so we quickly drove round the block and flagged him down. He said they don't have social and most of their members will be at Ararat this arvo. He welcomed us to rollup and told us where to find mats and jacks. We were so grateful to finally get some help, we jumped at the chance. To change the subject, Mal and Jean discussed yesterday how Jean bowled so well at Stawell Golf but Mal couldn't get the grass. He said "The third asked me to go round a bowl and my Aeros can't do it". Jean (who studied Physics in high school) said "Well, if you can stand your bowls up to go straight, surely the opposite would work. How about next time we roll up I put some bowls out wide for you to test it out." Mal thought about it overnight. At Aradale Jean put her bowls out for him to go around. We were impressed with the work the club had done. The green was synthetic. The sign said 16 seconds. We thought it much faster. Mal tried delivering his bowls with a slant. It worked! He showed Jean the slant and explained that as you put it down you remove the bias momentarily. As the bowl slows the bias kicks in and it turns more sharply and his bowls can go around. He was very pleased with his discovery. He kindly suggested Jean have a go at taking out his shot bowl. Instead she put the kitty in the ditch. Mal thanked Jean for her idea and said "That was a good hit-out!" We checked out the big bell. Jean (accidentally) rang it. Mal said "That woke the neighbours!". It was made in Glasgow in 1868. The plaque said the green was created in 2009 to replace the grass laid in 1970. Ararat - Thanks Aradale - not so much the other clubs.

We tried to ring Stawell Bowling Club but got no answer so drove up. Ivan the Stawell President happened to be there and told us they do play Saturday but alternate with the Stawell Golf Bowling Club. We put our names down to go to the Golf Club today. Ivan told us they also play Tuesday so we put our names down for that as well. We arrived at the Stawell Golf Bowls Club to see the funny sculptures. They were created by Frank Stewart who is no longer with us. They named the green after him. There is also a nice memorial to bowler Max. We met Terry from Match Committee who introduced us. We also met Muriel and Barb - the two oldest lady bowlers. The green is synthetic - fake grass. Running 14 seconds. Because it's a golf club, they have a tiny little club house in a shed. We played fours. Two games of ten ends on three rinks. A lot of players were away at competitions. Jean played lead with Rob, Laurie and skip Grant. (Jean, Grant, Laurie and Rob) Against Mal who skipped his team of Frank, Muriel and Ashley. (Frank, Muriel, Ashley and Mal). It was a fun game. Mal and Grant had a real skip tussle. The team said Grant is a former Australian champion and Australian representative player. Jean asked him and he said "Now I'm a has been". She didn't believe that. Jean got shot one end and kept it. Unusual in fours. Grant's team won by seven. We stopped for drinks and raffles before the second game. Second game Grant played a triple Peter, Ivan and Peter. Mal played Jenny, Rob and Terry. (Jenny and Rob) Jean was over the moon she worked out grass and weight on a Synthetic. She started with shot most ends (didn't stay that way of course) her team played really well. Took shot off the opposition when they had it. Grant bowled like the bowler we know he is. Laurie and Rob were awesome as well. Won the first seven ends. The opposition needed six to draw on the last end. Grant won by four and won the day. The team was the only two game winner. Mal played better in his second game because he didn't need to take as much grass. He nailed the weight. He enjoyed talking with Terry who was a Primary School teacher. Mal drew 11 all. After the game, Peter bought Jean a Chardonnay and said she could keep the glass to remember them by . Stawell Golf and Bowls Club - nice new friends.

Mal rang the number Jean found for Terang Bowling Club and spoke with Graham. He asked if they have bowls on Thursday. Graham said no but that he'd organise a rollup for us - 3pm. They have two nice Synthetic greens installed 18 years ago. We rolled up on the far one which ran about 18 seconds. We turned up at 3:10 and were welcomed by Graham, Ros and Peter. We rolled up, Mal and Jean against Graham and Peter. We had a great competition. They had it all over us most of the game. Mal put down some great bowls but Graham always pipped him at the post. He couldn't believe how much grass we had to take. Peter told Jean "Bowl to the edge of that brick building." We finally worked the green out and eventually won with one shot on the last end. Ros and Jamie rolled up next rink. The club has some great history. After the game Graham opened up the bar and shouted us a drink. We sat around with Graham, Ros and Jamie and talked all things bowls and regaled them with our adventures. They told us the club's claim to fame was member Margaret Sumner who was national champion and played bowls there right up to when she passed away last year. Graham gave us some pens to remember our visit to Terang. Terang - don't forget to take grass!

When we were at Camperdown on Sunday one of the guys told us Camperdown Golf and Bowls Club plays on Wednesday and gave us Peter's number to call. Mal rang and chatted with Peter and got our names down. We drove out for an 11am start. There was beautiful scenery on the way. Met Peter organising. Gary introduced us. This is the last Wednesday social as they close over Winter. It's a Synthetic green - fake grass. They have a sign to tell you which way to bowl. Good idea. They have an impressive sign with a magpie. The club is 'The Magpies' - after the footy club. Lovely outlook with a view of the hill and cows. With the lake behind. It was definitely an Autumn day. 14° with everyone in jumpers. It's two-bowl triples. Three games of ten ends. 42 bowlers. Costs $15 a head and you get lunch, tea and bickies. Jean, Mal and Bert played together (Bert, Mal and Jean) against Cliff, Peter and Russell. It started to rain so everyone took cover. Then the sun came out then and it was lovely. Green was quick. Jean's first bowl was on the money. After that she fell apart. The synthetic thing. Three quarters of the way through Mal and Jean worked it out and got two. Tough opposition then took shot off us. Jean was shocked when they said coming in to the last end, we were one up. We drew. We came inside for a nice ham, cheese and salad roll. And dessert. The raffle prizes were amazing. Donated by a club member Butch who's a member of a wine club. Apparently he donates to lots of clubs in the region. Mal won three bottles of Cab Sav. The guys tried to tell us that after the game they all sit around and drink the wine prizes. 2nd game was against Ray, Ken and Bazil. 1st end it clouded over and rained again, then the sun came out - again! Felt like we were in Scotland. We did a little better and won the first eight ends. Then they got a three and a four. We won ten to six. Third game against John, John and Chester. Game was a bit tougher. John and Chester are in the Division One Pennants final this weekend. Still, Mal and Jean gave them a run for their money. It rained again. We won 12 to four. John took Jean to see the photo of the 2022 Club champion. He gave us some Pennants stickers. Camperdown Golf and Bowls- fantastic fun, despite the weather.

Mal was ringing clubs to find out when they play social. Camperdown Bowling Club said "Today, in 20 minutes!" They assured us Lake Purrumbeet is only 15 minutes away so we raced out. They said they'd wait. We got there to a great welcome. We met David who introduced us around and everyone smiled. Many of the players weren't bowlers, they played Barefoot Bowls. Still, they bowled ok. There are two synthetic greens due for replacement. We played on the front green. Very sandy, not quite as bad as Colac City. It is two bowl triples. Two games of ten ends. There were two pairs who played with three bowls. Jean played with Pam and skip Brian against John, Jimmy and Herm. Jean put her first two bowls on the kitty. The boys thought they'd been duped. Brian's team got 5. Her team won convincingly. John and Jimmy bowl at Lismore. We've agreed to have a rollup there on Tuesday. Mal played second with Kelvin and Deb. against Patsy and Merve. Mal bowled well too. They won 12-8. Second game we played each other. Mal and Jean had a real competition. Mal's team won by 4 shots and won the day. He got a free drink at the bar. A welcome prize for Mal. We had great chats with Deb and her husband Gerald about bowls, beer and of course AFL. Camperdown - we didn't want to leave.

As organised with the boys on Sunday at Camperdown, we phoned John this morning to check we were on for a rollup. He said he was mowing and rolling today so we said we'd see him at Lismore Bowling Club around 1pm. When we arrived John was mowing. We met John and Jimmy. They are known around the place as the 'Bushrangers from Lismore'. They were there with their dogs Kol (Keg on legs) and Banjo, who just fathered 5 lovely puppies. The boys told us the club likely won't last long. They only have twelve or so members and John will be back at work soon so there will be nobody to maintain the green. The club has one old grass green. We were warned at Camperdown that you have to make sure you eat well so you can throw a bowl down. They weren't wrong. The wind was ferocious. Jean hardly got within 3 metres. Mal didn't do much better. Banjo followed Daddy everywhere. At one point he sat on the backhand in the middle of the green- we think to show John the grass to take. The boys were keen to protect the Lismore name against the Canberra blow-ins. We had a great game. Mal as skip did his best. We played ten ends. Going in to end nine it was five all. We scored one but sadly they won eight to six. Jimmy invited us to the local for a coldie. After he finished up at the club John joined us for a great chat about bowls and life in a country town. Lismore - held up by Bushrangers!

We went to the Colac Bulla factory. There was a sign to say they are refurbishing and one could buy goods from Coles. Where's the fun in that? So we went to Colac City Bowling Club for a rollup. The club has four greens - two grass and two synthetics. Both grass greens are ordinary. The bottom one will be replaced soon with synthetic. We asked the reception staff if we could have a rollup. They were concerned because the greens were being prepared for Pennants finals at 1pm. They told us to ask the guys. We got our bowls, went outside and met Roy. He explained that one grass green is out and that external players may turn up to practice. He suggested we roll up on the 'Old Synthetic ' up top. We did. It was awful. Covered with sand. We had to take a rink-and-a-half of forehand grass. It left a sand smear on our bowls. After four ends Jean said "I'm not rolling on this any more, it's scratching my bowls!" Mal said "Yeah, it's like bowling on concrete!" The bowls made a noise all along the green as they rolled. Roy asked us how we went. Jean said "Not keen on that synthetic!" He invited us to do a couple on the new one. He said "Hard to go wrong with this - it's true". Mal talked briefly with Trevor and Stewart about the fake owls. They said they were to keep birds away. Mal told them about the snakes they used at Geelong RSL to keep the bats away. (Trevor, Stewart and Mal) We rolled two ends on the front synthetic. Much better. Very true line. We didn't really keep score. Jean killed the last end and Mal drew shot with his last bowl. Colac City Bowling Club - make sure you bowl on the front green!

We're only in Colac for one night so we came late in the day for a rollup at Colac Central Bowling Club. We came in to ask if we could have a rollup and met Bertie, Roger and Gary. We told them about our trip and Roger proudly showed us his badge from the Division One Pennants win for Tuesday comp. While we were getting our bowls they must've told President Greg about us. Greg came and speak with Jean at the bar and invited her to speak to the members, who were here for the Friday night raffles, about our trip. Greg introduced us and Jean gave her talk. She congratulated the club on their Division One Pennant final win on Tuesday. We stayed for the raffles. Lots of people wished us well. June the Lady President stopped for a chat and Dennis talked with Mal about all things caravan. There is one synthetic green. It's an old style flat carpet. It was quite quick but the line was true. We had pretty good heads. The score was pretty even. The wind came up and our bowls went in the ditch. Greg raced out as we were leaving to give ud directions to Red Rock for a scenic view of the town. Colac Central - congratulations to awesome bowlers!

Jean's Thermomix broke down again so she had to take it all the way to Moorabbin for service. While we waited we decided to find a club to roll up at. Mentone was close so we popped in. The place was deserted. We took Jerome with us because we didn't know how long we'd be. The club has three greens. Two grass. One normal size and one 3-rink one that is overgrown. There is also a nice carpet synthetic. We rolled on that. Jean did surprisingly well, given it's synthetic. She got grass and weight well. Mal bowled ok too. He didn't take Jean's shot bowls out. Think he felt bad about Valentines Day. He's a sweetie. She told him he's allowed on occasion - just not every shot! It was pretty level. Jean would take the lead, then Mal. We decided to make it the last end when it was five all. Mal took shot. Jean drove and killed the end. We put the kitty on the T. Jean had shot but Mal had another bowl. It went in the ditch. Mentone - a rare win for Jean!

Mal kept on his quest to ring all the clubs to find out when they have social bowls. Yesterday Portarlington rang him back to say they play Wednesday. He got our names down. We were running late so rang to say we were on our way. When we arrived they were already out. We met Anne and Robbie in the office. They said "You're ok, you still have ten minutes." The club has two synthetics, with a lovely view of the ocean. We played on the quick one. The club was founded in 1920 which makes it 103 this year. We started with a minute's silence for a member who passed on Sunday. Very solemn. The flag was half mast. It was three-bowl triples. Two games of ten ends on five rinks. Jean played lead for skip Anne and Joan (Joan, Anne and Jean) against Keith, Tony, Ian and Rob. Triple played with three bowls (skip two) and four played with two. Despite it being a fast synthetic, the line was true. Jean got her first couple of bowls close. They won the first end. Lost by five. We went inside for a cuppa and raffles. Anne's husband had caught some fish and donated them. Jean said "I'm going to win the fish!" First draw was Tony, he chose the fish and gave them to Jean. What a lovely gesture. Mal played lead for skip Sue with John (John, [photobomb], Mal and Sue) against Ken, Ian and Mal. Jean often heard comments like "Great bowl Mal." Or, "Take out that bowl of Mal's." They won. Jean played game two against skip Margaret, Christina and lead Peter (Grumpy) from Yarrawonga. Grumpy gave us his number and told us to contact him when we get to Yarrawonga and he'll introduce us around. (Christina, Peter (Grumpy) and Margaret) Jean bowled better second game and often took shot. The team was behind the whole game and needed four on the last end to draw. Got it. Like many small bowling clubs they had great bar prices: $7.50 for a beer and a soft drink. Portarlington - goodbye and thanks for all the fish!

No games anywhere on Tuesday so decided to go for a rollup at Queenscliff which doesn't seem to have social bowls. It's actually QBT&C. Queenscliff Bowls, Tennis and Croquet Club. It was a nice drive out there from Barwon Heads. The club has three grass greens. That was a nice change. When we met there were some women in uniform having a drink. We met Secretary Di who told us they'd played today - dodging the rain. She took Jean to a tent thing at the entry where the mats and jacks are kept. The green was pretty slow so we did short ends. We had pretty tight heads mostly. Mal finished with thrèe. While we played, Di's husband arrived for a pairs championship. We went inside for a drink and Jean spent an hour booking caravan sites for the next week . That was tough. There seem to be events all over Geelong and Colac this weekend. Found an unpowered sote for a night in Colac then Lake Purrumbeet near Cobden. Queenscliff - nice to play on grass for a change.